rfs mike

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Dec 30, 2002
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 :laugh:


Hollywood Squares (2nd try)
<BLOCKQUOTE>Those of us old enough to remember the old Hollywood Squares Game in the 70's will appreciate this.&nbsp; Responses were spontaneous and not scripted as they are now.

<BLOCKQUOTE>Q: If you're going to make a parachute jump, you should be at least how high?

A: Charley Weaver: Three days of steady drinking.

Q: True or false...a pea can last as long as 5,000 years?

A: George Gobel: Boy it sure seems that way sometimes...


Q: You've been having trouble going to sleep. &nbsp;Are you probably a man or a woman?

A: Don Knotts: That's what's been keeping me awake.


Q: According to Cosmo, if you meet a stranger at a party and you think he's really attractive, is it ok to come out directly and ask him if he's married?


A: Rose Marie: No, wait until morning


Q: Which of your five senses tends to diminish as you get older?


A: Charley Weaver: My sense of decency.

Q: In Hawaiian, does it take more than three words to say "I love you"?


A: Vincent Price: No, you can say it with a pineappleand a twenty.


Q: As you grow older, do you tend to gesture more or less with your hands while talking?

A: Rose Marie: You ask me one more growing older question, Peter...and I'll give you a gesture you'll never forget.

Q: Charley, you've just decided to grow strawberries.&nbsp; Are you going to get any during your first year?

A: Charley Weaver: Of course not, Peter. I'm too busy growing strawberries.


Q: In bowling, what's a perfect score?

A: Rose Marie: Ralph, the pin boy.

Q: It is considered in bad taste to discuss two subjects at nudist camps. One is politics. What is the other?


A: Paul Lynde: Tape measures.

Q: Can boys join the Camp Fire Girls?

A: Marty Allen: Only after lights out.


Q: When you pat a dog on its head he will usually wag his tail. What will a goose do?


A: Paul Lynde: Make him bark.


Q: If you were pregnant for two years, what would you give birth to?

A: Paul Lynde: Whatever it is, it would never be afraid of the dark.

Q: According to Ann Landers, is anything wrong with the habit of kissing a lot of people?

A: Charley Weaver: It got me out of the army.


Q: It is the most abused and neglected part of your body - what is it

A: Paul Lynde: Mine may be abused but it certainly isn't neglected.

Q: Charley, what do you call a pig that weighs more than 150 pounds?

A: Charley Weaver: A divorcee.

Q: Back in the old days, when Great Grandpa put horseradish on his head, what was he trying to do?

A: George Gobel: Get it in his mouth.

Q: Who stays pregnant for a longer period of time, your wife or your elephant?

A: Paul Lynde: Who told you about my elephant?

Q: When a couple have a baby, who is responsible for it's sex?

A: Charley Weaver: I'll lend him the car. The rest is up to him

Q: Jackie Gleason recently revealed that he firmly believes in them and has actually seen them on at least two occasions. What are they?


A: Charley Weaver: His feet.

Q: Do female frogs croak?

A: Paul Lynde: If you hold their little heads under water long enough

Q: Imagine you are a child in your mother's womb, you detect light?

A: Paul Lynde: Only during ballet practice.
 
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